Living With Divorced Parents

Hey guys,

I wasn't really sure if I wanted to write this, but I thought that this could help someone really struggling right now. With the holidays coming to an end I have realized how much I have changed since my parents got divorced. For me its been about 5 years, but the holidays and winter are when it effects me the most. Overall, it really does suck, but it does get better. I have developed a way to get through the holidays and really any day without having their divorce ruining my favorite time of the year.

My biggest thing to tell you is to not pick sides. It can be really hard to stay level headed, trust me. My hardest Christmas's were the ones were I was constantly thinking mom's would be better or who would get me the better gift. That doesn't make anything better and it just puts you in a position where you aren't enjoying the time with the parent. I had picked sides in the beginning and it just ended up with me getting hurt no matter what.

An easy way to try to make it easier  around the holidays is to have your parents split the holidays evenly. One has thanksgiving and one has christmas, then next year they switch. I think this is really helpful so you don't feel like your favoring one parent over the other. This can be an awkward talk at first, but usually both will end up agreeing and just needed someone to start the conversation.

Packing has always been an issue for me while going between my moms and my dads. I live full time with my mom but see my dad a lot. This makes the wardrobe situation a bit crazy, especially because I like to have ALOT of options. Having the basics at both make it the easiest. For me that is a cozy sweater, jeans, boots, necklace, and under garments. I know this seems simple, but it makes things a bit easier and is something you no longer have to worry about.

Finally, don't be afraid to talk about it. It is totally okay to see a counselor or a therapist because having your parents divorce can be so scary and heart breaking. It is something that is out of ones control. There is no shame in seeking help about what your feeling about your parents divorce.

I hope this helped any of you going through divorce. If any of you need to talk about it or have any questions for me, feel free to email or comment.

XO, Allie